In grade school, I started reading Hardy Boys, most likely because our school "book collection" (definitely not a library) wasn't so impressive, and my guess is, I probably liked the covers too. I'm not sure I really understood them, but I loved the idea of using my own brain to create imaginative scenes from printed words.
Then in 5th grade, I discovered a short story called Fever Dream, by Ray Bradbury. It truly changed my life! I needed so much more of this! So soon after, I got Fahrenheit 451, then Martian Chronicles, Something Wicked this Way Comes, and eventually The Illustrated Man. Those books were so important to me! I fell in love with Bradbury's imagination, and "poetic" style of writing. It also helped that they were a great escape from the real world (aka school), which generally sucked. This inspired me to join the science fiction book club, and get lots more books. I can't say I read them all... but I wanted to!
I could go on about some of my favorites, like Roger Zelazny's Chronicles of Amber, or Douglas Adam's Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. And then I'd have to rant about how I became obsessed with Harlan Ellison's writing, who was one of the people I credit for making me who I am today. I can't say if that's good or bad, but regardless, that's what happened.
So here we are, a few years after high school, and due to life being rather "life-y", I don't read nearly as often. In the last few years, I have picked up some of the classics, such as random Edgar Allan Poe stories, as well as the first Sherlock Holmes book, (which was awesome!). I also started reading Moby Dick, but kept getting distracted and still haven't finished it. I enjoy what I've read so far, and I want to finish it, I swear! I just need to get back into that reading mindset, and simply ignore life's annoying little influences.
It does help that I surround myself with nerdy friends that enjoy berating me for not having read some of those classics. As I'm sure you can imagine, nerd peer pressure can leave you feeling rather desolated. But never are they more eager to take away my nerd card than when I tell them I haven't read... The Lord of the Rings. Yes, they react about the same way you just did. Sorry!
It does help that I surround myself with nerdy friends that enjoy berating me for not having read some of those classics. As I'm sure you can imagine, nerd peer pressure can leave you feeling rather desolated. But never are they more eager to take away my nerd card than when I tell them I haven't read... The Lord of the Rings. Yes, they react about the same way you just did. Sorry!
In my defense, fantasy books were never my thing. Which is strange, because I played Dungeons and Dragons! Tolkien could easily be credited as the co-creator of D&D. But when I read books, I prefer something otherworldly, futuristic, or at the very least, a bizarre twist on our modern life.
So it took me some time, but after my friends came down on me like wizards at my doorstep, they finally convinced me to go on an adventure, whether I wanted to or not. And after going there, and back, I'm ready to give you my review of:
The Hobbit
*Disclaimer
Normally I keep my reviews spoiler free. However since it's been over eighty years ago, I hope you'll understand if I cover some of the more poignant details in the story. If you'd rather not have anything spoiled here, please read the book and come right back. If you need encouragement to begin, I have some rather militant nerdy friends that would be willing to have a talk with you.
Okay, show of hands, how many of you knew The Hobbit was a children's book? So... everyone but me. Fine. Yes it was written for children, which explains the songs and silly names (Dwalin, Balin, Kili, Fili, Dori, Nori, Ori etc). Keeping in mind that children from the 1930s were already far more intelligent than most adults today, it still made for a fairly easy read.
Bilbo was a great character, and I could uncomfortably identify with his desire to sit at home and do nothing. But somehow Gandalf and the Dwarves convinced him to get out of the house. How? Apparently because thirteen on an adventure was unlucky...? But unless there is a great reveal later as to why it had to be Bilbo, I think there were plenty of other professional types of burglars they could have hired in the Prancing Pony tavern nearby. But I guess Halflings gotta have a hero too, so...
The actual travelling part of the book seemed to drag a bit, (as is common with most extensive journeys). But it was always fun seeing Bilbo become the reluctant hero. Whether fighting giant spiders, or playing uncomfortable riddle games with Gollum, or even negotiating peace with Bard, he was consistently clever and very good at thinking on his furry little feet, mostly out of desperation. And as we all know, a hero is only as good as the villain, and Bilbo was always facing some very interesting enemies. I particularly liked this Gollum creature, and hope we get to see more of him in the future!
"...But Deeesher, what about the other heroes???"
Um... I guess Gandalf had a couple nice moments. Maybe I skimmed past the scenes where the other Dwarves saved the day? Okay, let's be honest, this entire book could have happened with just Thorin, Bilbo, and Gandalf. Well, whenever Gandalf wasn't off doing 'other things'. If you want to look at this metaphorically, an argument could be made that Gandalf was the "parent" letting Bilbo learn to do things for himself. But I prefer to think that Gandalf just had a bad gambling problem. Regularly he was teleporting out to the tracks because he had money riding on the ponies. Hey, he was a wizard, not the 'lead-to-gold' alchemist kind.
Now let's take a moment to talk about Dwarves.
Ugh... They're a hairy, beer guzzling, unkempt, warmongering race. My guess is they don't even bathe nearly as often as they should making them also quite smelly. Not only did Bilbo repeatedly have to save them, they did absolutely nothing to further the plot. In fact, they often seemed rather ungrateful for all the times Bilbo did have to save them! One Fourteenth was his cut... seriously?? He should have re-negotiated that contract. More like two-thirds the treasure by the time they got there!
Having said that, I confess I did get a bit choked up when Thorin finally reconciled with Bilbo in the end. After all they've been through, it was good to see him come to terms with how much Bilbo really did try to help the disgusting hairy little bastards.
However, if you get a chance to see the 1977 Hobbit animated movie, I think you will find that a much closer adaptation. And nothing against the Peter Jackson/Andy Serkis version of Gollum, but the animated version made him rather nightmare inducing *shivers*
Your Precious,
Deeesher
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